Tag Archive for 'how to'

How to handle people

I’ve now met all kinds of people. The saints, the snobs, the beautiful, the ugly, the loaded, the poor, the friendly and the assholes. Here’s what I’ve learnt:

  • Most people out there have good hearts. Most, but not all.
  • If you make a mistake dealing with someone don’t wait. Fix it now. You may never get another chance.
  • If someone hurts you don’t hurt them back. Just walk away. And forget about it. Life’s too short.
  • Be yourself. Always.

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How to better your life

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about life and living. After moping for a while I realized something simple and profound. It hit me like a bright light shining in my face: you have to be excited about your life. Perhaps I can help you with getting there.

1. Answer a question
Start with this question you’ve likely heard many times before: “What would you do if you woke up with a million dollars?”. Don’t laugh it off. It could be the most important thing you will do. Take as much time as you need to think about yourself while answering. In my case, I don’t care about living long but I while I’m here I would like to fly and make music (among other things). Don’t forget to dream big. What you say will determine what you will be able to accomplish. If you don’t dream big for yourself do you think that someone else will do it for you?

What do you really want to do? Who do you really want to be?

2. Write down your answers
Grab a piece of paper and jot down your initial Mind-mappinggoals. Then expand on all possible avenues you can use to get there. To put my thoughts down I use a free mind-mapping program called Freemind but a pen and paper will do. Make sure you don’t throw away what you write! You and your dreams might change over time so don’t forget to keep reviewing and modifying your plans as you need to.

Where there is a will there is a way.

3. Learn to become fearless
You must become fearless in order to face two obstacles: yourself and the people around you. If your plans for life don’t intimidate you at all then you’re not dreaming big enough. After fighting my fears for the last six months I have begun to reap its rewards. To learn more about how I started read this entry.

“There is nothing to fear but fear itself” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

4. Get started and keep going
Even though you have big dreams make sure you start small. This is essential to build up your confidence and experience. As you inch towards your goals you may have to work hard and face failure but if you are excited about where you are headed you will be able to endure. If your dream does not excite you then don’t waste your time pursuing it!

Don’t forget to continually track yourself. Write down what went wrong and how you can improve. For goals that involve developing a daily habit keep a journal or use a tool such as Joe’s goals. Benjamin Franklin is famous for using charts to track his virtues. Finally, when you hit a milestone don’t forget to note what you have accomplished. This will help encourage you when you are feeling down.

Reach for the stars. Even if you fail you’ll land on the moon.

What are you waiting for?

Update: You can view a mind-map that I’m using on this page.

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Twitter: why and how

There are over 350 million people using Facebook. That’s more than 5% of the Earth’s population on one website. Chances are that you’ve got an account there. I certainly do.

Why Twitter?

After using Twitter for a few months I recommend that you try it for one specific reason: Twitter is brilliant at helping you find and make friends with people you’ve never met before. Facebook on the other hand connects you with friends you already know.

Twitter kung fu

How to use Twitter

Twitter can be used in many ways depending on what you want to get out of it. The lack of guidelines confuses many people who give up on it too quickly.

Here are my tips on socializing with Twitter:

  • Set it up properly: Make sure you fill out everything on your profile page including your full name, location, bio and a picture.
  • Design your profile: Change your page colors and background image to your liking. If you know how to make an exceptional background do it! Update: try themeleon.
  • Search, follow, listen and talk: (1) Use the search box to find people talking about something that interests you. (2) Follow people if you like reading their tweets. (3) Listen to the existing flow of conversation. (4) Talk to people and get to know them.
  • Develop a Twitter policy: Once you’ve been using Twitter for a while you’ll need to make a few rules of your own regarding other Twitter users. This is important so that you don’t get overwhelmed. Here are mine: (1) I only follow people who have real conversations. This rules out internet marketers, spammers and others who won’t care about anything you have to say. (2) I always block any of the aforementioned marketers and spammers if they follow me as I like to keep my followers list clean. (3) I use the “lists” feature in Twitter to categorize people I follow and to filter conversations.

All of the above are simply recommendations. You will gradually figure out how to use Twitter in your own way. If you’re interested in making the most of Twitter you’ll also want to take a look at Twittercism and Twitip.

You can find me on Twitter at twitter.com/anopenscroll. I’d love to hear from you! One more thing:

Whether on Twitter on anywhere else, always be yourself.

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How to become fearless

The man with intention

Want to be as fearless as 007 or Gandhi? Fearless people are rare but extremely effective in changing the world around them for better or worse.

1. What do you really fear?
Know what the underlying reason for your fear is. It’s not a person or thing that causes you concern but what you’re afraid to lose. If you’re afraid to mention something to a friend, you don’t fear him or her but the loss of your pride, friendship or something else you have that’s important to you.

If you want to be fearless you must have nothing to lose.

2. Consider both sides, then decide
Fear is natural and is a good thing. It is a warning that you may be negatively affected in one way or another. Again, you may be affected, not will. We assume that our feelings tell us what to do, but they simply provide us with information. Weigh your options, think about what you can or cannot lose and then make a choice.

If you don’t think before dealing with fear, you’re neither brave nor cowardly; you’re stupid.

3. Do what you’ve decided
If you decide to fight your fear you might face failure, but the sting of failure is better than the deep wound of regret you will have for not having tried. You may not get a second chance.

Once you’ve made your choice stop thinking and just do it.

Am I fearless? A lot more than I was a few years ago. I know what I’ve lost to get this far.

“A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.” – Timothy Ferriss

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